You’ve heard cliché  after cliché  about how difficult 2020 was, and for good reason. It was long and lonely, and every day seemed to be a vague repeat of the one before it.

So, for those of us who usually like to celebrate special occasions, it may be difficult to imagine how to make this Valentine’s Day stand out from every other night you’re spending at home. But the silver lining is that spending Valentine’s Day at home allows you the opportunity to spend quality time with yourself or your loved one(s) without the pressure of dealing with external factors like dinner reservations or bad weather. There are lots of little luxuries you can enjoy at home that can make the day feel romantic—and romance is not just for couples! Self-care can feel romantic when you treat yourself exactly the way you like. So, here are some ideas to help inspire your lockdown love-in, whether you’re spending it solo or with a partner. 

PLAN AHEAD

Food delivery apps are likely going to be swamped that night, so it might make more sense to plan on making dinner instead. Make sure you have all the ingredients you need to treat yourself and make your favourite meal. Maybe that includes a fancy beverage, and maybe some dessert, too, if you’re feeling ambitious. If you’re not a baker (or, if you reached your limit baking all that sourdough bread in the Spring), get something decadent delivered a few days before and freeze it. Take the ambiance up a notch and prepare playlists to dine, dance, and get dirty to.

Or if you're really not feeling up to making food for yourself, just prepare for long wait times for a food delivery app, and tip appropriately, because those people are putting in some work!

DRESS UP

If you’re like us, you can probably count on one hand how many times you’ve worn anything other than pyjama pants or jogging pants this past year. Putting on a nice outfit is bound to feel extra festive, plus you don’t have to take a coat and winter boots into consideration. Whether solo or with a partner, get fancy, then take some photos to commemorate the event!

DO SOMETHING NICE FOR YOUR BODY

Do some yoga, go for a walk, take a bath (add candles and music—it makes a big difference!), do your own at-home spa treatment, rub your favourite lotion all over your body—anything that ignites your senses and makes your body feel cared for. If you’re partnered, you could try a scented massage candle or massage oil and take turns savouring each other’s body, or indulge in some self-massage on your own.

GET FRESH

You might feel like there’s pressure to have the best sex of your life on Valentine’s Day, but pressure never made anyone’s sex life better. Instead of stressing over unattainable expectations, invite in curiosity and make it a goal just to try something new. Take an online workshop (like our G-Spots and Female* Ejaculation for Couples workshop on February 14) and then try out what you learned. Or curl up with some new erotica—take turns reading it out loud with your partner until it inspires other activities.

Discover something new about your partner (and yourself) by asking deep questions. Make a date with your favourite toy and try exploring different positions, rhythms, and erogenous zones. Also: candles make everything more romantic!

Even though Valentine’s Day often only looks one way in our minds, it’s really an opportunity to celebrate love in whatever form it shows up for us. There’s no one right way, so doing things a little differently this year might not be such a bad thing. In a time where it feels important to take advantage of any reason to celebrate, here’s a chance to show ourselves and our loved ones the extra appreciation we all deserve.

Written by Alex Friedman