Ten Tips for (even more) Pleasurable Anal Sex

There is no right or wrong choice when it comes to choosing your path to anal pleasure. You get to decide what you want to do and how far you want to go and when you want to stop. Wherever your adventures take you, remember the following:

1. Slow it down. Almost everyone who shares their experiences with me emphasizes the need to slow down whatever you are doing to be able to feel, listen, and enjoy the process.
2. Consider your goals. For most of us, a primary goal of sex is pleasure. If you manage to accomplish taking in a penis/outie, specific sex toy, or number of fingers, good for you! But hopefully that’s not at the expense of pleasure, however you define it. Don’t concern yourself with what others can do or enjoy. There is no point in trying to compete with your peers.
3. Lube! For pleasure and safety, use lots of it. And then add some more. Try a few brands until you find your favourite.
4. Start on the outside. If you plan on going inside, don’t cheat the external nerve endings of your anus out of their own pleasure. Give them some attention to warm you up—plus, it feels great.
5. Listen to your butt. It's smarter than you think! Don’t try to force it to do anything it doesn’t want to do or it will backfire. Pay attention to any pain, uncertainty, or limits that you reach to prevent tearing or harm to your body. Don’t try to mask what your butt is saying with numbing or desensitizing products. Have patience and practice your technique to expand those limits if you wish, but don’t forget that you’ll need your butt’s cooperation. ‎
6. Communicate your desires. Don’t be shy to speak up about what you like and what you would prefer. There are no rights or wrongs when it comes to desire and pleasure, and no shame in asking for what you want, whether it be to go, stop, or change. Communication is necessary to make sure you get exactly what you want!
7. Play safe. For each activity you choose, know its risks, no matter what kind of relationship you practice. From prep to aftercare, plan out your adventure possibilities and start with the information and supplies you need to make it the best and safest possible.
8. Invest in proper toys. Always use sex toys with a flared base. Ask anyone who has worked in a hospital emergency ward about items retrieved from butts. The anal sphincters rarely work perfectly afterward. Explore our anal sex toys to see what you might like.
9. Stick around. Especially if you played internally, give your body time to respond to the stimulation. Until you have experience with how your body reacts to butt play, it’s prudent to stay close to a bathroom.
10. Be good to your butt. It's important to treat your butt well when you're not having sex, too. Eat well and adjust your diet if you are constipated. Don’t put off your BM's if you can help it. Attend to hemorrhoids and other health concerns. You and your butt are partners for a lifetime!

Want more? Check out sex educator and GFH founder Carlyle Jansen's book on Anal Sex Basics or listen to her recent guest episode of Sex Therapy with Dr. Jones here.