Choosing a Harness for Strap-On Play
The right strap-on harness is a great way for any couple to enjoy vaginal and/or anal penetration. There are lots to choose from and deciding which one is best for you should be based on control, comfort, function, and aesthetic appeal. The harnesses at Good For Her are all top quality and highly functional—in fact, many of them have lifetime warranties. They are sold separately from dildos so you have the freedom to create your perfect sex toy combination.
Some people gravitate towards a double-ended dildo that does not require a harness. While these can work well, they generally require the person wearing it to squeeze their legs tight and/ or hold the sex toy in place, thus restricting positioning, comfort, and flexibility during play. The extra 30 seconds it takes to put on the harness is worth the ability to be in any position you like, relax your thighs, and leave your hands free.
Most harnesses sit low on the pelvis and fasten around the hips. The tight fit makes it easy to penetrate a partner while at the same time receiving pleasure from the pressure of the dildo base. Some models, like the Spare Parts Joque, have internal pockets for small vibrators that can provide even more fun for one or both partners.
The Basics of Strap-On Harness Styles
A two-strap or jock-style harness has two straps that pass on the sides of the genitals and go around the butt cheeks to fasten at the back or sides. This leaves the wearer open for genital and butt play and is the most popular style of harness. The Aslan Jaguar Jock is our most popular harness overall.
A one-strap or G-style harness has a single strap that passes straight between the legs and fastens in the middle at the back like a g-string. For those who like g-string sensations (people call it “butt floss” for a reason), this style offers slightly more control and, though it leaves the wearer less open to genital play, the strap can provide clitoral stimulation and/or hold a small dildo or butt plug inside the wearer.
The two-strap harness the Minx comes with a wider back piece. This additional piece adds extra control to the harness so that the dildo stays well in place during vigorous play. It also expands to fit larger bodies. As a bonus, it frames your butt in the shape of a heart!
Underwear harnesses such as the Rodeoh are super comfortable for extended play and wearing under clothes. If you are wearing it out on a date, there's no need to get changed when you want to get playing. It also can make the dildo look like it's part of your body, poking out through the flap. However, this style of harness is not the best for control, especially with heavy dildos, as they are not as secure against the body as harnesses with side buckles. Also, the elastic waist stretches over time and they fit very specific sizing, so they don't accommodate body changes or sharing between multiple partners.
The highly underrated thigh harness is great for anyone with mobility or lower back issues or people who don't like the placement of a dildo on their pelvis. It also offers more thrusting power and the option for more intimacy (touch, kissing) with sexual positioning. It’s a fun style of harness to check out if you want to try something different. The Sportsheets Thigh Harness has a great grip and is comfortable for both partners.
People with penises also can use strap-on harnesses. These options sit higher than the harnesses mentioned above and have a comfortable pouch in which a penis can rest. These sex toys are a great option for overcoming erectile challenges, continuing penetrations post-ejaculation, penis-free penetration, experimenting with different sex toy sizes, or double penetration. The two-strap style is generally better than the one-strap for folks with penises. Those with less material below the hole for the dildo, such as the Simple or Commando, are generally more comfortable in this case. Alternatively, the Aslan Protector has a pouch to hold and hide the penis. The Spareparts Deuce can be used for either two dildos or for one penis and one dildo for double penetration.
The Best Materials for Strap-On Harnesses
Garment leather: These styles have aesthetic appeal, durability, and a lifetime warranty. They should be cleaned and conditioned with leather-safe products and cannot be used in water.
Rubber: These styles are suitable for vegans and can safely be used in the shower—just make sure to properly dry the hardware afterwards. They are sturdy, easy to care for, and come with a lifetime warranty. They also offer the best control of the dildo than any other styles as the rubber hugs the skin without slipping.
Fabric: This style is very comfortable to wear for long periods of time and can easily be cleaned in a washing machine. The elastic on the Spareparts Joque makes them flexible—which means that the dildo will move around a little more (less control) but also means that you can get extra pressure against the clitoris with thrusts (it pulls out a little from the body and then adds stimulation as it pushes back into the body). Underwear styles such as the Rodeoh will need to be replaced eventually when the elastic components begin to break down.
Nylon: The Aslan Simple Harness is a great affordable and flexible starter harness. People like that it's stealthy and easy to keep clean, but the tradeoff is that the nylon is not as comfortable as other materials.
Adjustable Hole Size
Leather and nylon harnesses often have an additional O-ring in them to add additional support. Sometimes this O-ring can be changed for another larger or smaller size—but in the Jaguar style, for example, the leather can buckle. The Commando and Simple styles have O-rings that can be changed easily with the Cock Ring Set for the perfect fit to the base of your dildo. These two harnesses also come with two straps but one can be removed to make a G-style harness. Some folks also wear them under underwear for a “natural” look.
Finding Your Comfort Zone
Some people, especially those with sensitive clitorises or without much fat on their pubic bones, can experience discomfort with repeated pressure underneath the dildo. Using a Driver Pad that hooks onto a harness or Sili Saddle that sits under the base of the dildo can add extra cushioning to minimize discomfort so that you can focus on both your and your partner's pleasure.
Want help finding your perfect strap-on harness? Don’t hesitate to ask our helpful staff—we're always happy to chat about the variety of harnesses we offer.
